Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
Randomize
