you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
Randomize
