he wants to bone in the snuggie
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
PS: I just woke up from my shower
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
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