The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
