I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
He booked his flight from Dallas already, no ticket to the game, said hes gonna bang some girl at tailgait to get a ticket, I had to explain that it will be sub 20 degrees F during tailgate, he decided to come in july instead, Texans are dumb.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Randomize
