did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Neil John just started open mouth kissing everyone to make sure they are safe.
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
