Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
Randomize
