thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
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