found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
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