I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
if my 20s were a chapter in my autobiography, it would be called "the room is spinning and my hands smell like dick"
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