You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I think I just met the technical qualifications for binge drinking in five minutes
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
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