No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
Someone came in the potted fern
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
