i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
