it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
Im looking at the faintest of claw marks right now. I just fell in love all over again.
Randomize
