Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Randomize