I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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