im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
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