Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
