marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Because of no shave november, it's no boys december... pay back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
.... I'm on a random couch somewhere in Newark wrapped in a Lightning McQueen blanket
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize