I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
he held my hand while i was giving him head. freud's gotta be turning over in his grave
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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