Plan B is the new Plan A
grandma shit on top of the toilet
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
I couldn't be mad. She was crying because she fell bare ass into the rose bush trying to pee. So I held her up mid-stream and she peed on my feet. No big
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
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