Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Randomize