thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
