I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
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