I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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