As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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