Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
When you and Blake get an apartment I want you to buy this Costco couch I'm currently passing out on.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
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