help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
Randomize
