So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
