when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
My uber driver just told me I smell like fun...still drunk at 7 am
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
lol hangovers are for mortals.
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
Randomize
