Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
Randomize
