someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
smell my finger.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
So much rum. So many feels.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
