I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR