other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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