his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
The fact that I can sew my leggings while intoxicated proves I'm a functioning alcoholic
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
