But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Good news: I actually puked in my bathroom, the vomit from the living room was actually from someone else.
That's horrible but hilarious
I'm going to miss college.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Randomize
