so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
