Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
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Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
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You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
I had tater tots and weed with a stripper at 4am who compared the size of my boob to her head because fuck you my life rocks
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
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