exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
Girls should come with a carfax report
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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