I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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