bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
Randomize