lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Come home. Im drunk and cutting my own hair. This is bad, i need you.
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
