You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
