Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
i wish my penis had a tongue
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Randomize
