so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
this whole "benign brain tumor" is truly a blessing in disguise. I almost want to start bringing MRIs to the bar because sympathy pussy is flowing like the nile
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
