you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
