i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize