ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Randomize
