Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
