Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I was stumbling so much, men walking behind us were shouting "don't hit the pole! don't hit the pole!" whenever I was near a telephone pole.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
2013: the year of legs covered in hair and pregnancy scares.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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