did you get engaged???
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I asked my mom if I was the drunkest one in the room. With 8 days till I go back to school, I couldn't care less about being shitfaced at a baptism
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
Naked Twister starts at high noon
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Randomize
