sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Randomize